Makes a Great Gift for Everyone!
Do you spend countless hours wandering the mall aimlessly with the rest of the sheep looking for the Perfect gift for Grandma, that hard to buy for brother or sister, or maybe that newborn infant of a coworker's significant-other's female acquaintance?
(insert mental image of dumbfounded 40-something rich-looking moron experiencing the realization something is a conundrum )
This product is the answer!
(insert mental image of same moron with blinking light bulb over empty head)
Think of the MONEY they will save not replacing those EXPENSIVE and difficult to replace button batteries!
(insert uncoordinated moron using a huge screwdriver and 2 pipe wrenches while working with a tiny device)
They will thank you!
They may even be gullible enough to believe you have some intelligence!
(insert mental image of moron looking slightly skyward, smiling, and nodding in complete agreement, possibly with his index finger on his chin)
Remember, there is a rock-solid 100% complete No Questions Asked satisfaction guarantee!
If you are not satisfied for any reason within 2 hours, simply return the pdf file with a $39.95 return processing fee, and your money will be refunded!
I will even refund the shipping charges, so you risk Nothing!.
Waiting for even more Savings? Now is the chance you have been waiting for!
Order now and ask for 3 equal interest-free payments of only $38.99!
Tell the operator you have coupon code "I M N idiot" for the most special treatment reserved for a select few customers having a good credit rating.
This is a limited time offer.
This Special Offer will be withdrawn at midnight several years after no more people will pay for it.
Don't delay any longer!
Order Now!
This is a totally certifiable Limited Edition release certain to gain in value after the pdf file is no longer available online!
The total quantity of instructions sold are limited to no more than the exact number of people willing to pay for them!
Don't delay!
Order Now!
Before it is too late!
(insert mental image of moron being sad as he realizes it is too late)
Quickly and incomprehensibly Whisper-
Claims made are not intended to imply everyone will become a Rock&Roll Star,
The US FDA has not tested or approved this device for any purpose.
Any example shown are extraordinary and not typical for most purchasers.
(insert mental image of moron doing something distracting to the audience for the duration of the disclaimer)
Imagine ghurd tap dancing in a tutu as you retrieve your credit card and dial the phone.
Priceless.